The Balanced
Mom –
Fact or Fiction?
By Lesley Spencer Pyle, MSc. - Founder & President,
HomeBasedWorkingMoms.com
It’s a
pretty well known fact: Moms are pulled in many
directions and their to-do list almost never gets
completely crossed off. There’s the kids, the husband,
the house, the chores, the errands, the laundry, the
meals, the appointments, the kid’s activities, the
birthday parties and on and on. It’s an intensive job
that requires some great time management and
organization to ensure that everything gets done (or
almost everything), and there’s still enough time to
spend relaxing and enjoying your family.
Being
a balanced mom is possible. It does take effort,
planning and a bit of flexibility but reducing the
stress and enjoying the unique and diverse roles of
motherhood are well worth it.
Here are some tips to you find balance as a mom:
- Use
a calendar to stay organized. Keep track of home, school
and work activities and appointments on your calendar.
It may work best to use a desk calendar that you can
take with you as well as set calendar reminders in a
program such as Outlook to remind you of certain
repeating activities, practices, birthdays, bills to
pay, etc. Check out the Go Mom planner (GoMomInc.com)
which has to-do lists, calls to make, grocery lists,
etc. to make our lives easier.
- Be a team. Ask for help when needed and offer help
where needed. Perhaps one week you can be in charge of
homework or baths and the next week your spouse can.
Come up with mutually beneficial plans to help your
family function and have lots of time for family fun!
- Plan
ahead and use your time efficiently. For instance, plan
all of your errands for one day of the week so you
aren’t wasting time running around.
- Let
go of guilt and know that you cannot possibly do
everything. Whether you need to order take out or say no
to a volunteer request, know that you are doing what’s
best for you and your family but not overextending
yourself and putting unnecessary burdens and
expectations on yourself.
- Hire
help when needed. Whether it’s a babysitter, a virtual
assistant, a housekeeper or some other area that you
need help with; don’t let your duties overwhelm you.
There are lots of great options out there to help
lighten your load. Check out HBWM.com for listings of
virtual assistants that can help with your business and
ask for referrals from friends and neighbors for
babysitters or housekeepers.
-
Schedule a weekly date with your spouse as well as
individual time with your kids. Also make time for
yourself. Do not let one area of your life dominate the
rest. If you allow it, a growing business can control
your time and consume your focus.
- Use
your evening time wisely. Instead of plopping down in
front of the TV, go on a long walk with your spouse
and/or your kids. Have a picnic dinner in the backyard.
Play a game or do something that enables you to really
connect with your family.
- Be a
smart shopper and meal planner. Buy cookbooks with
quick, healthy meals such as crock pot meals that can
cook all day or meals that you can double and freeze for
another night. No need to do it all every night.
- Know
that you can always adjust and change your options. If
the choices that were right for you last year are not as
good this year, reconsider and re-evaluate all of your
options. Talk it over with your spouse and close
friends. Then decide what is best for you and your
family today. Take life by the horns!
- Stay
flexible. Just as your children grow and your marriage
matures, your individual, career, family and marriage
needs will also grow, change and develop. Stay open to
changes and realize that growing with each of these
areas will be fresh, exciting, challenging and probably
at times, frustrating and tiring.
- If
you work, remember in the end it is not going to matter
how much you dazzled your clients or employer with long
hours if you miss out on treasured moments with your
children and your spouse. Remind yourself to check in
occasionally on where you are spending your time…. and
where you are not.
- Do
what’s best for you and your family. Don’t allow others
to dictate what the best option is for you and your
family.
With
these tips and your own tried-and-true ones, you will
find that being a balanced mom is not fiction. It truly
can be fact. It just takes planning, delegating,
flexibility, a positive attitude and some great
organization. As a mom, I can proudly say and I’m sure
you would agree: There’s no better or more rewarding job
in the world!
Copyright HBWM.com, Inc. 2008
Lesley Spencer Pyle is the founder and
president of the HBWM.com, Inc. Network
which includes: Home-Based Working Moms (www.HBWM.com
) and Hire My Mom www.HireMyMom.com ) as
well as four other related websites. Read
more about
Lesley Spencer
Pyle.
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